One for the Table has never engaged in deliberate snarkiness. I’ve
certainly avoided it as I scrupulously adhered to the motto “if you
can’t say anything nice…” But, in this economy, I find myself being a
bit cranky when certain chefs hold themselves to a particular standard
and humiliate others on national television, when they themselves have
a restaurant that is pitiful. Gordon Ramsay has set himself up as the
arbiter of quality, but after eating at The London twice now, I can
tell you The Emperor has no clothes on.
The first time I went there, I was really excited to have the English
Breakfast. I loves me sausages. What I got were these dry, jerky-like,
lukewarm salt tubes accompanied by a roasted tomato whose flavor was
incomprehensibly bad. How can you mess that up?
The second time I went was because my daughter’s admissions counselor
for the college she’ll be attending in the fall was staying at the Bel
Age hotel where The London is located. Looking over the menu, I felt
like a pinball being battered around from bad choice to bad choice.
Los Angeles
Los Angeles
Mozza Mozza
Mario Battali’s newest haunt in L.A.
Mozza Osteria, Mario Battali’s newest adjunct to his Mozza Pizza just opened on Melrose, just west of Highland. Though most new restaurants in LA advertise their debut date months before to start a healthy buzz and build anticipation, Mozza Osteria remained cas about it’s opening date: “Sometime this summer”; “Early July, if you’re lucky”. So my ever-dedicated foodie friend Ben stalked the restaurant for months; until one day, he saw lights on inside and seized the opportunity to make not one, but four! reservations. I should consider it a privilege that he deigned to invite me.
Gelato Bar
Despite the fact I have parents who eat ice cream almost every day (if they could have it at every meal, they would), until
recently I thought I could live happily without ever lifting a dessert spoon again.
I know what you’re thinking. Quelle horreur! C’est impossible! I tell you it’s true. When I gave up my 2-liter a day Coca-Cola habit in college in an effort to regain a good night's sleep (caffeine is not my friend), I found, after a few months, I no longer craved sugar. As my tastes matured, I discovered the savory complexity of wine and eating dessert no longer interested me. Since ice cream was never one of my favorites, I didn’t miss it.
Hipster Pho
"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"
"It's a really obscure number. you wouldn't have heard of it."
Since starting my dance company, my affiliation with hipsters has grown exponentially (and it wasn't exactly non-existent before). So instead of fighting it, I've decided to fully embrace all the customs and habits of this (increasingly less) rarified group of moustache sporting, shower shunning, flannel-wearing, beanstalk-bodied ugly ducklings. To accomplish this, I consult my sister, who, while she is much too beautiful to need to hide behind hipster affectations, is an expert on all things Eastside and off-the-beaten path.
Bar Hayama
What is wrong with me? Why do I drive past intriguing places and keep on
driving? Or, why do I keep going to the same places because I know
them, they are familiar and safe? My friend, another foodie, Andrea, had made a plan with me last night to
try a Japanese restaurant. Then, she kept reading reviews online that
scared her straight. This new Japanese usually costs $100 per person.
She called me ahead of time to warn me and then told me she really likes
this other place on Sawtelle. So now we really have two choices.
When I hopped in her car, she navigated her way around the city in such a way as to end up directly in front of the alternative restaurant and not the original terribly expensive restaurant. I still don’t know whether she did that on purpose, but I was hungry and said, lets just go in there. I had seen it before and it called to me. When she mentioned a place on Sawtelle I just thought it was Hide Sushi and I do already go there all the time.
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